coffee talk

Deepest.

shoegirl — Thu, 22 Sep 2011 11:17:03 +0000

Words are inadequate. Gestures are too fleeting. You live in the veins, in the deepest of my being.

Twilight.

shoegirl — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 11:21:35 +0000

Let me be with your ghost in the quiet. Words and gestures are too fleeting. Here, you belong to me in the deepest.

Recycled: December 9, 2009

shoegirl — Sun, 13 Jun 2010 12:17:11 +0000

Isn’t It A Pity?
(Gershwin)

Why did I wander
Here and there and yonder
Wasting precious time
For no reason or rhyme
Isn’t it a pity
Isn’t it a crime
My journey is ended
Everything is splendid
Meeting you today
Has given me a wonderful idea
Here I stay

It’s a funny thing
I look at you
I get a thrill I never knew
Isn’t it a pity we never met before

Here we are at last
It’s like a dream
The two of us, a perfect team,
Isn’t it a pity we never met before

Imagine all the lonely years we’ve wasted
You with the neighbors
I at silly labors
What joys untasted
You reading Heine
Me somewhere in China

Let’s forget the past, let’s both agree
That I’m for you and you’re for me
And it’s such a pity we never, never met before

Imagine all the lonely years you wasted
Fishing for salmon
Losing at backgammon
What joys untasted
My nights were sour
Spent with Schopenhauer

Let’s forget the past, let’s both agree
That I’m for you and you’re for me
And it’s such a pity we never, never met before

(Secretly waiting for the one who has wasted years reading Heine and Schopenhauer, or fishing for salmon and losing at backgammon. I am here, wasting my precious years too.)

Happy birthday.

shoegirl — Sun, 30 May 2010 04:13:54 +0000

This really choked me up. A birthday wishes from my friend Vinod.

May you will always have a long and happy life, be healthy and merry, full of hopes, dreams, anticipation, excitement, and spirit, and most importantly, uh, may you will find him. Him that will stay in your bed forever. Him that will never walk out that door for good. Him that will cherish you. Him that will be bad enough to make you want him, but good enough to have only you for him. Him that will tickles your brain, and… other body parts too. And him that will put a ring on your finger, only when you want him to do that.

Love you! God bless you! All the best for you, and may today and more will always be wonderful for you.

*choked up*

The Morning After

shoegirl — Sun, 02 May 2010 03:39:47 +0000

People who commit suicide never know that the morning after somehow looks better and bearable. They never give morning a chance.

I hope I will always give morning a chance. Every one of them.

A promise made after an unkind night. A promise that needs to be recalled and never be forgotten.

Beyond.

shoegirl — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 08:28:27 +0000

It’s beyond love. It’s an all-consuming adoration that never ceases. Heeding every word, seeking every approval. Relentlessly.

Inadequate.

shoegirl — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 03:22:16 +0000

The Ghost called yesterday evening. Shared with me his dreams, fears, and hopes. And his daughter. How she likes to listen to Ghost by Indigo Girls. (!)

Oh, dear Ghost, words are inadequate.

You Are.

shoegirl — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 09:33:01 +0000

I’ve been just floating through life this past year, like a lost kite. Like Captain Jack Sparrow’s compass—supposedly tells the direction of something you really really want, but instead the hand aimlessly turns round and round. No stable ground to step on, just hanging on to nothing but a wisp of cloud.

Half a breath. Half a life.

You used to be my center. And now I am so off-balanced. I used to set my heart, my mind, my soul on you wherever I go. And now I lose all direction.

You’re the compass I always set my bearing to.

You’re my North, my mecca, my cross to bear.

You’re my religion.

You’re the only one I believe in.

When all else fails, you’re the one rock I cling to.

My Little White Dress

shoegirl — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 10:30:46 +0000

I found the perfect little white summer dress. Light, crisp, wearable to work. And today I pair it with a small, thin green cardigan, the color of lime. Perfect. The most favorite colors. The most beautiful mood. And it has the comfort level of this:

Welcome, my filigree days.

shoegirl — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 03:00:15 +0000

The hiatus, the stagnant period is over. I’m still treading on water, carefully, gingerly, but I keep walking alright. It’s been a looooong 6 months, but I am ready to move on. The other night, when I was watching Jamie Oliver show on TV, it was like the enlightening moment. When I saw the food, the pictures, I was reminded of all the things that I was passionate about. I had forgotten all those things, to make room for something else. And at that certain moment, I found again what I’ve been missing, without realizing that it had been slipping through my fingers all this time.

Little enlightening moments, that’s all we need to remind us that life is worth living. (Except when you’re too suicidal to think straight, but that’s another matter. Just making use of the good mood.)

So I guess this is a new chapter for me, literally. I don’t like the cliche, but cliches won’t be cliches if they weren’t tested and true. I am ready to embark on my old life that I miss so much, although time-wise I move forward to the unrevealed future. (Oh, let me reconnect with things I once enjoyed, the future can unfurl itself without my tampering. And cliches be damned.)

Yes, I will be alone. Yes, it is rather daunting. But it will be my life, and I am the one calling the shots.