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Haunted by your ghost.

Ghost
Indigo Girls

There’s a letter on the desktop
That I dug out of a drawer
The last truce we ever came to
In our adolescent war
And I start to feel the fever
From the warm air through the screen
You come regular like seasons
Shadowing my dreams

And the Mississippi’s mighty
But it starts in Minnesota
At a place that you could walk across
With five steps down
And I guess that’s how you started
Like a pinprick to my heart
But at this point you rush right through me
And I start to drown

And there’s not enough room
In this world for my pain
Signals cross and love gets lost
And time passed makes it plain
Of all my demon spirits
I need you the most
I’m in love with your ghost
I’m in love with your ghost

Dark and dangerous like a secret
That gets whispered in a hush
(don’t tell a soul)
When I wake the things I dreamt about you
Last night make me blush
(don’t tell a soul)
When you kiss me like a lover
Then you sting me like a viper
I go follow to the river
Play your memory like a piper

And I feel it like a sickness
How this love is killing me
But I’d walk into the fingers
Of your fire willingly
And dance the edge of sanity
I’ve never been this close
In love with your ghost

Unknowing captor
You never know how much you
Pierce my spirit
But I can’t touch you
Can you hear it
A cry to be free
Oh I’m forever under lock and key
As you pass through me

Now I see your face before me
I would launch a thousand ships
To bring your heart back to my island
As the sand beneath me slips
As I burn up in your presence
And I know now how it feels
To be weakened like Achilles
With you always at my heels

My bitter pill to swallow
Is the silence that I keep
It poisons me I can’t swim free
The river is too deep
Though I’m baptized by your touch
I am no worse at most
In love with your ghost

You are shadowing my dreams
(in love with your ghost)
(in love with your ghost)
(in love with your ghost)

~
Lucky for me, I don’t have any reason to feel so depressingly tragic as this song would definitely send me plummeting down any bottomless abyss nearby.

Thank you, Adrian, for introducing me to this beautiful sad song.

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You know it’s a warning sign when you start to hear Chet Baker’s Little Girl Blue moaning from your iPod. That, and the angelwings picture starts to appear on your YM. And then, the songs trickle down to Stacey Kent’s So Romantic, or The Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Diana Krall.

The Boulevard of Broken Dreams

I walk along the street of sorrow
The boulevard of broken dreams
Where gigolo and gigalette
Can take a kiss without regret
So they forget their broken dreams

You laugh tonight and cry tomorrow
When you behold your shattered dreams
And gigolo and gigalette
Awake to find their eyes are wet
With tears that tell of broken dreams

Here is where you’ll always find me
Always walking up and down
But I left my soul behind me
In an old cathedral town

The joy that you find here you borrow
You cannot keep it long it seems
But gigolo and gigalette
Still sing a song and dance along
Boulevard of broken dreams

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Landslide

I took my love, I took it down

I climbed a mountain and I turned around

And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills

Till the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?

Can the child within my heart rise above?

Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?

Can I handle the seasons of my life?

Well, I’ve been afraid of changing

‘Cause I’ve built my life around you

But time makes you bolder

Even children get older

And I’m getting older, too

Yes, I’m getting older, too

Oh, take my love, take it down

Climb a mountain and turn around

And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills

Well, the landslide will bring it down

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Romantically Tragic

Stacey Kent. I wouldn’t call her a jazz musician/vocalist. Jazzy, perhaps, or pop-jazz, some might call it. But nonetheless her jazzy voice is quiet and subtle, a little slippery, as if she wasn’t sure she can reach higher notes, and we braced ourselves too… and then she galloped with beauty.

I love this review about her on New York Times:

The least ornate of pop-jazz singers, Ms. Kent pounces on lyrics with a no-nonsense directness. Emotions are muted but not stifled. High drama is absent.

Recently I love repeating one song in particular, from album Breakfast On the Morning Tram. Here it is:

So Romantic

You always had a taste for those movies
Like Casablanca and Song o’ My Heart
Where a complicated world
Or the call of adventure
Forces true lovers to part
When the hero turns his back so stoically
On all the happiness they might have had

You always considered it
So romantic
But I just considered it sad

It was so like you to choose such a moment
The sun setting over the square
A pavement cafe, the local children at play
The sound of an accordion somewhere
You suddenly said Fate was pulling us apart
Then you shrugged, like there was nothing more to add

I suppose you considered that
So romantic
Well, I just considered it sad

Perhaps you’re living in America now
Perhaps you’re in Timbuktu
A small part of me, even after this time
Has never stopped waiting for you
To live in this state of hoping
When hoping seems so utterly mad
I can’t help but consider that so romantic
Though I know I should consider it sad

The I is a quarter of me, and the You is another quarter. Or it used to be that way. Because things are different now, and I don’t want to be awfully tragic anymore; it’s exhausting. Nevertheless, when I first really listened to the lyrics, I remember thinking, Well, that’s just something familiar.

Anyway, it’s a sad song. And beautiful. Beautifully sad. Oh, and by the way, do you know the lyrics were written by Kazuo Ishiguro? Yeah.

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Sexy Playlist: Update

Ahem.

Yes, there was a bottle of pinot noir. But we opted for a chardonnay instead. There was no luring, because you needn’t lure the willing. And that playlist… let’s just say it worked darn well. And then he added a playlist of his own.

Can’t wipe this big grin off of my face. Sorry guys.

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Sexy Playlist

Hmm. It’s been awhile since that last posting about Harry Potter leakage. I’ve read it, by the way, and it was quite good, with a satisfying ending, although Year 5 is still my favorite. And… a lot, I mean A LOT, had happened since then. Since my last post, mind you, not since Year 5.

I’m not gonna indulge myself and do a monologue about it, don’t worry. I’m sure a handful of you have heard enough. (You can have your retching fit later, guys. Late…er.)

I just wanna share my playlist, my special playlist #1, the one I want to have at the right timing. What "timing"? you might ask. Well, let’s just say that if a guy wanted to cook for me in his place and serve a bottle of nice pinot noir, and lure me to sofa area afterwards, this is what I want to hear softly on the background.

Here you go:

  • Embraceable You – Chet Baker
  • My One and Only Love – Chris Botti feat. Paula Cole
  • What a Difference a Day Makes – Renee Olstead
  • By Your Side – Sade
  • I’ve Got a Crush on You – Stacey Kent
  • Time After Time – Chet Baker
  • Someone to Watch Over Me – Renee Olstead (or anyone for that matter)
  • Everytime We Say Goodbye – Julie London
  • I’ll Be Seeing You – Chris Botti
  • They Say It’s Wonderful – Stacey Kent
  • Lovers Rock – Sade
  • Desafinado – Lisa Ono
  • How Love Should Be – Chris Botti feat. Paula Cole
  • Come Rain or Come Shine – Chet Baker
  • Sunday Kind of Love – Renee Olstead
  • Mensagem De Amor – Lucas Santtana
  • There’s A Lull in My Life – Chet Baker
  • Fools Rush In – Stacey Kent

Oh… I think you’ve got the point. It’s overkill, I admit. But, hey, what can I say, I’m a hopeless romantic.

(And for the rest of you, you can have your retching fit right now.)

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this is the second part of my compilations. bear with me. brace yourself. allright, here we go.

4. Separated by Usher

this is about two people who can’t seem to make their relationships work.

why don’t you go your way/and I’ll go mine/live your life/and I’ll live mine/baby you’d do well/and I’ll be fine/cause we’re better off separated

5. I’ll Be Over You by TOTO

as soon as forever is through/I’ll be over you

forever is too long, baby. when will this pain be over? never.

6. Ain’t No Sunshine by Bill Withers

how could everything around you seems to be the same when your blood is turning to tears in your veins?

7. The Hardest Day by The Corrs and Alejandro Sanz

the melody, the violins, slit your heart with razor sharp sadness.

never wanna wake up from this night/I’ll never wanna leave this moment/waiting for you only/only you

never wanna forget every little thing you do/when loving you is my finest hours/leaving you the hardest day of my life

8. If I Ain’t Got You by Alicia Keys

I’m not sure if this is officially categorized as a broken heart song, but it IS for me.

hand me the world on a silver platter/and what good would it be/with no one to share/no one who truly cares for me

if it ain’t you baby/if I ain’t got you baby

9. If You’re Not The One by Daniel Beddingfield

when you can’t have the one you love, you ask why, and pray, and hope.

and I hope that you’re the one I share my life with/and I wish that you could be the one I’d die with/and I’m praying you’re the one I build my home with/I hope I’ll love all my life

cause I love you whether it’s wrong or right

10. On Bended Knee by Boyz II Men

can we go back to the days our love was strong/can you tell me how our perfect love goes wrong/can somebody tell me how to keep things back the way they used to be

how could a love so perfect go terribly ugly?

ten sad songs for now.

this.

is.

exhausting.

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